Perfection achieved
Andrew Bolt
I think we understand the lightness of the new editor of Meanjin from the very first sentence of this Age puff-piece:
ALTHOUGH SHE’S A Buddhist, Sophie Cunningham doesn’t believe in reincarnation.
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Apocalypse (not) now
Andrew Bolt
Physicist and weather forecaster John Kettley notes that Britain, like Australia, has grown chilly:
Atrocious weather has seriously delayed the harvest this year – by now oil seed rape, barley and oats should already have been gathered…
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Declare precincts “idiot free” instead
Andrew Bolt
Idiotic:
FIRST there were nuclear-free zones, then alcohol-free zones. Now gay-friendly Sydney is set to introduce homophobia-free zones…
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Gold for the damn middle classes
Andrew Bolt
Jeff Randall discovers the wrong kind of people are winning Britain’s unusual haul of Olympic medals:
Unfortunately, no sooner had our rowers, cyclists and sailors collected their medals than the carping started - largely on account of their successes being clocked up in “posh” sports. That a disproportionately high number of these British champions went to fee-paying schools is regarded by some as a symptom of a divided society, evidence of a deep-rooted malaise.
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The Olympic Games were so good that no one volunteered to remain behind in Beijing after. - ed.
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BIAS OBSERVED
Tim Blair
A fine new addition to our doofus dictionary:
… the McCainStreamMedia …
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OBAMAL WARMING
Tim Blair
Global warming causes Barackian bumbles, according to Agence France-Presse:
Barack Obama and Joseph Biden both fluffed their lines today as the new White House running mates ceded an opening to their Republican enemies by veering off-script.
Perhaps it was the temperature nudging 100 F (37.8 C) that forced Senator Obama into a slip of the tongue as he introduced Senator Biden as “the next president’’ before correcting it to vice president.
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BLOSSOMING “UNFORTUNATE”
Tim Blair
Not only is doomer drama Scorched going to air during a month of historic coldening, it was made at a time of abundant rainfall:
What [director] Tony Tilse and the producers hadn’t counted on was the weather—during pre-production early this year, it began raining in Sydney and didn’t stop.
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DEFLATED DEMOCRAT
Tim Blair
Depending on which opinion poll you read, US Presidential candidate Barack Obama is either tied with rival John McCain, leads by a tiny margin, or has been overtaken.
This is confusing to many pundits, who don’t understand why a far-left, first-term Senator with dodgy mates, no policies, a profound humour deficit and a habit of committing astonishing gaffes isn’t in front by 20 points.
After all, Obama isn’t exactly starved of press coverage.
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WE’RE ALL LOONS NOW
Tim Blair
The reverse enlightenment continues in Britain (and elsewhere):
Imagine telling somebody twenty years ago that by 2007, it would be illegal to smoke in a pub or bus shelter or your own vehicle or that there would be £80 fines for dropping cigarette butts, or that the words “tequila slammer” would be illegal or the government would mandate what angle a drinker’s head in an advertisement may be tipped at, or that it would be illegal to criticise religions or homosexuality, or rewire your own house, or that having sex after a few drinks would be classed as rape or that the State would be confiscating children for being overweight.
Imagine telling them the government would be contemplating ration cards for fuel and even foods, that every citizen would be required to carry an ID card filled with private information which could be withdrawn at the state’s whim. They’d have thought you a paranoid loon.
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THEY SHOOT RABBITS, DON’T THEY?
Tim Blair
They do in Sweden:
Stockholm’s population of wild rabbits has been curbed thanks to the city’s Traffic Office. Around 4,000 rabbits have been shot by specially hired bunny busters.
Hmmm. What does Stockholm’s bunny-busting Traffic Office do to actual traffic offenders?
Joe Biden says what he thinks .. we should vote for McCain.
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Save the planet, audit a hungry pensioner
Andrew Bolt
Maribyrnong Council has a plan for saving the planet from global warming. It involves sending in the carbon cops to audit people too helpless to object:
Facilitate energy and water saving audits for Meals on Wheels clients
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Theory washed out (but believers keep faith)
Andrew Bolt
So far, so conventional a piece of reporting on the Bracks Government’s water plans:
The Age has obtained two confidential reports by University of Melbourne systems scientist and microbiologist Peter Coombes, which appear to challenge the Government’s big-project direction.
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Rudd means less
Andrew Bolt
As Peter Costello would ask: are you better off now than you were when I ran the economy?
Daily Telegraph polling of Sydney voters reveals working families {Kevin Rudd] invited to the fore of his election campaign are worried about going backwards. Almost 80 per cent of those surveyed by Galaxy said household finances had tightened since the change of government last November.
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Truants chased with an axe
Andrew Bolt
Very tough - and perhaps too tough:
FAMILIES on welfare will lose their benefits for up to three months if their children constantly duck school. Government legislation this week will ask Parliament to endorse the tough conditions in a bid to end alarming truancy rates in some areas.
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In a way, we’re winning
Andrew Bolt
Former Labor speechwriter Dennis Glover is dismayed that we of the alleged “Right” haven’t shut up:
MANY thought that after Labor’s election victory last year the Right would retreat into its ideological bunker to rethink its ideas and wait for more propitious political times to emerge and take the offensive. Many even essayed that The Australian may sack a few of its commentators. How wrong they were.
It appears electoral defeat has made the intellectual Right even more assertive…
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Scaring people the approved way
Andrew Bolt
The Business Council of Australia is accused of being alarmist about global warming - by highlighting the cost of Kevin Rudd’s plans to “stop” it:
The former chief executive officer of the Clean Energy Council, Dominique La Fontaine, accused the BCA of producing a political document that the media, including The Australian, had reported in a way that “scares people”.
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Keating discovers truth, justice and peace
Andrew Bolt
Paul Keating announces his revolutionary new plan for world peace at the Melbourne Writers Festival:
A new international order based on truth and justice founded in the recognition of the rights of each of us to live out our lives in peace and harmony can, I believe, provide the only plausible long- term template.
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Amnesty claims IOC 'failed' in Beijing
Human rights group Amnesty International has accused Chinese authorities of violating human rights during the Beijing Games and slammed the International Olympic Committee for letting it happen.
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'You'll die in vain': Hero's message to Bali bombers
Patrick Byrne, who risked his life to save others in the 2002 Bali bombings, will be honoured today.
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Rudd rules out East Timor for guest worker program
Dili and Canberra will discuss ways East Timorese workers can work temporarily in Australia but there are no immediate plans for East Timor to take part in a guest worker scheme. - Rudd can practice apartheid legally by using his foreign trade powers.. - ed.
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Couple tries to swap sex with five-year-old for used car
A couple in the United States have been accused of attempting to trade sex with the woman's five-year-old daughter for a used car. -as appalling as it sound. -ed.
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